This was written during one of the nights I processed through much heartache. This particular piece was produced through the thoughts of how difficult it is to live, and love as an empath. I easily get confused by which thoughts are mine and which aren’t when it gets to this point. I tend to make choices based on these thoughts, but then forgetting I may be acting out of desire, and not fact … Many people tend to leave when this happens …
Many believe that desire is suffrage … I do not agree … If the desire that this poem portrays is considered suffering, I need to come up with another word for suffer because these desires are the very things that motivate me. If it wasn’t for these desires, I wouldn’t move. If it wasn’t for these desires, I wouldn’t change. If I am to believe that desire is a form of suffering, I would then have to believe that my motivation is suffering me too.
*Twitch* does not compute … My point is … Desire, passion, and emotion in general is all that encompasses me. If these things are the things that … For lack of a better phrase … Make me suffer … Ick! Not playing the victim, here … But really, if my entire being is encompassed by the things people consider to be suffering from, I think it’s healthy for me to desire a partner who can ease those emotions. When I find someone who does that, I fall in love, in some kind of way.
I pick up, and recycle energy all the time. I do it by choice, yes! Sometimes When I go to recycle it, funny things happen to me. The personal growth that came with this poem is definitely one of the happiest, funny things since I started recycling energy on a healthier level. Then, sometimes love gets the best of me, and i forget who’s energy is who’s. It sucks when that happens …
But here is one of my poems … Enacted Desires …
The thought of …
… Your bare chest against my back
Leaves me to rest my heavy head on your shoulder
… Your muscular arms wrapped around my body
Leaves me to release my overworked empathic shield into your embrace
… Your strong base grinding against my ass
Leaves me to exhale my exotic words into your ear
… Your sturdy limbs intertwined with my limbs
Leaves me to feel blessed in our web of secrets
The desires of …
… You softly whispering “Hello” in my ear
Leaves me to say “I love you”
… You unknowingly giving sensation to my body
Leaves me to move with approval
… You unexpectedly sharing insight to my soul
Leaves me to smile with enthusiasm
… You continuously releasing energy into my spirit
Leaves me to cry with gratitude
Things are brighter now, because …
… You are my surprise safe place
I wish you knew me
… You are my every desired thought
I pray you hear me
… You are my single worst fear
I trust you love me
… You are my late night dream
I hope you see me